Hey
Me & Andrew have had a good readthrough of the 1st draft youve sent, got to say its looking promising! Obviously its a 1st draft, theres going to be changes, tweaks etc. but i think most importantly youve got the feel of this story - (its an enigma, stories & portrayals clash etc.)
the structure you have - cutting back and forth between the interview room & the tales works really well, i like the Alice & wonderland references (alice, hat) I quite like the religious zealot priest idea, and some of the dialogue i thought was interesting.
I appreciate that we only gave you a vague outline of story/character/location to work with, and that youve took some of the directions out, but as a foundation to start working on its really good man.
I'll try and get a more detailed feedback from me and andrew to you A.S.A.P, but some definites for now:
me and andrew have some locations we'd like to have in such as some part of the priests story being set in his actual church
some subtle hints towards the tarot cards will be needed, could be Kal/moon playing with a pack of cards while being questioned or whatever subtle hint that would link it to characters without being too obvious
as for getting the 2nd draft sorted by wednesday, I'll try for that, Ive got a couple of job interviews (I need to earn some dough man!!) & some location/materials stuff to do for fracture this weekend - atm Andrews down with flu so isnt really able to do much, Im kinda handling the producing role up until were closer to production...
BUT i dont want to speak for andrew on his scipt opinions, so its just getting him to do that once hes well, hopefully I can get you a proper feedback by saturday/sunday at the very latest, and could meet up for a chat about how the 2nd drafts going/ or any problems on Monday?
cheers
Richard
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From: adam_iv@hotmail.co.uk
To: ricardo_blanco@hotmail.co.uk
Subject:
Date: Tue, 28 Sep 2010 01:34:22 +0100
Okay, the thing to remember here is that all the dialogue is terrible and used only to get across the general contents of the story, the directions have been taken out as I'm not too sure what you and Andrew want to do and other little things, like the characters lacking names etc. This is the bare bones first draft of Fracture and I would love your input so that I could have a second draft by next Wednesday, as this will be one of my Craft Development projects (two birds, one stone).
Cheers!
Thursday, 30 September 2010
Wednesday, 22 September 2010
Title Sequence Research
Alongside the police moodboard ideas for a title seqeunce, I also like the idea of the psychological profile of the main character. Looking at the music video for Gnarls Barkley - Crazy, I was interested in the idea of using the Rorschach ink blots moving to create text.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bd2B6SjMh_w
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bd2B6SjMh_w
Also some other interesting title sequences using different textures, sillouhettes etc.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m_Qg1pQSOa0
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